Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Monday, September 28, 2009
Fascination With Death
I have a colleague who’s fascinated by accidents. It seems as if he gets a hard-on every time one of us walks in the office in the morning announcing that he/she is late because he or she had been in an accident.
“WHAT?” he’d ask. “An accident?!” with a barely concealed smile. “come here!” he’s pat the chair next to him. “tell me all about it!”
“WHAT?” he’d ask. “An accident?!” with a barely concealed smile. “come here!” he’s pat the chair next to him. “tell me all about it!”
So on one of those lazy, dragging, I-wish-I-could-jerk-off-a-little afternoons couple of days ago, I hear an explosion of air being discharged, that’s a cue for my said colleague bursting in laughter. We look at him quizzically and warily. He’s still laughing, but raises his hand in an international gesture of one who's seeking patience. When he finishes laughing, saliva splatter all over his desk, voice hoarse like a hooker, he goes:
“hahahaha…man, hilarious story on Al Emarat Alyoum”
“what’s it about?” I ask.
By this time he’d composed himself and, quite the storyteller, he’s eager to replay the story to us. Although he knows we’d rather have the link.
“a police officer is talking about the rescue unit and their highlight moments this year.” He clears his throat again and goes on “so there’s this incident where a guy goes swimming near the Burj Al Arab beach, turns out the red flag is raised but he didn’t see it”
(the red flag is warning against swimming due to high tides or other weather conditions)
“ok?” I prod him to go on
“so he swam for a while and then started drowning, somebody called the marine police and they came hurrying to rescue him”
“that’s great. But not spectacularly funny”
“wait, there’s more. When the police left the guy after ensuring he was alive and well, he goes swimming again”
“no shit?”
“I’m telling you. And he was about to drown, but the police caught up with him once again. He barely made it”
“well, I’m glad he’s fine”
“wait, there’s more. After the police leaves for the second time, this guy goes swimming again, only this time he didn’t make it, he drowneddd…HAHA” (colleague keeps on laughing hysterically)
“man, you’re sick”
“wait, there’s another story”
“I’m done, save your stories for your family gatherings” I swivel on my chair to face the computer screen once again.
“what’s wrong?”
“you’re talking about death man, this guy was a human being. It’s not right to make fin of deceased people, let alone the way he or she had died” I said without looking at him.
“oh.. yes, sorry, I really thought he’s stupid. That was the funny part”
“stupid or not, he didn’t deserve to die. Or to get laughed at”
“right, right”
By now my colleague is subdued and solemn. I’m not sure whether he’s pretending or he’d gotten really embarrassed by his lack of compassion. After couple of minutes he says in a grave voice.
“wow”
“wow what?
“sad story here”
“listen, I’ve had enough--”
“no no , this one is different. It’s really sad and maybe we could draw some morals” he says, bobbing his head forward and backward like he’s delivering a sermon.
“ok. Go on”
“alright, so this officer is talking about freakish accidents. Here, he talks about a sedan car which had hit a truck on the Emirates Road. 4 fatalities. Wanna know how they died?”
I furrows my eyebrows and prepars to lunge and make this dude a victim of a freakish accident himself. But I restrained myself.
“how?”
“hahahaha…man, hilarious story on Al Emarat Alyoum”
“what’s it about?” I ask.
By this time he’d composed himself and, quite the storyteller, he’s eager to replay the story to us. Although he knows we’d rather have the link.
“a police officer is talking about the rescue unit and their highlight moments this year.” He clears his throat again and goes on “so there’s this incident where a guy goes swimming near the Burj Al Arab beach, turns out the red flag is raised but he didn’t see it”
(the red flag is warning against swimming due to high tides or other weather conditions)
“ok?” I prod him to go on
“so he swam for a while and then started drowning, somebody called the marine police and they came hurrying to rescue him”
“that’s great. But not spectacularly funny”
“wait, there’s more. When the police left the guy after ensuring he was alive and well, he goes swimming again”
“no shit?”
“I’m telling you. And he was about to drown, but the police caught up with him once again. He barely made it”
“well, I’m glad he’s fine”
“wait, there’s more. After the police leaves for the second time, this guy goes swimming again, only this time he didn’t make it, he drowneddd…HAHA” (colleague keeps on laughing hysterically)
“man, you’re sick”
“wait, there’s another story”
“I’m done, save your stories for your family gatherings” I swivel on my chair to face the computer screen once again.
“what’s wrong?”
“you’re talking about death man, this guy was a human being. It’s not right to make fin of deceased people, let alone the way he or she had died” I said without looking at him.
“oh.. yes, sorry, I really thought he’s stupid. That was the funny part”
“stupid or not, he didn’t deserve to die. Or to get laughed at”
“right, right”
By now my colleague is subdued and solemn. I’m not sure whether he’s pretending or he’d gotten really embarrassed by his lack of compassion. After couple of minutes he says in a grave voice.
“wow”
“wow what?
“sad story here”
“listen, I’ve had enough--”
“no no , this one is different. It’s really sad and maybe we could draw some morals” he says, bobbing his head forward and backward like he’s delivering a sermon.
“ok. Go on”
“alright, so this officer is talking about freakish accidents. Here, he talks about a sedan car which had hit a truck on the Emirates Road. 4 fatalities. Wanna know how they died?”
I furrows my eyebrows and prepars to lunge and make this dude a victim of a freakish accident himself. But I restrained myself.
“how?”
“they were over-speeding. The driver and a passenger in the front, and two other fellows in the back seat”, he swallows, near tears “so it seems they were drunk. It was dark and they probably didn’t see the high cabin trailer in front of them.”
“so?”
“so the sedan hits the truck, but since it’s low, it’s lower body goes down beneath the truck. But the windshield and everything above the mirror level get instantly destroyed”
“so how did THEY die?”
“decapitated. All of them”
“HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!”
*gasps for air*
“HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!”
………………………………………
P.S. I of course wouldn't laugh at such an accident. My aim was to try to get even with the asshole.
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Something the RTA Might Consider .....
....to ease traffic woes in Dubai:
"UNLOAD ON THESE N****S KEVIN, UNLOAD!"
"UNLOAD ON THESE N****S KEVIN, UNLOAD!"
Saturday, September 26, 2009
Inglorious Bastards -- Review
If you're still harboring doubts about the effectiveness of 'enhanced' interrogation techniques; like waterboarding (a CIA favorite), or the stress position, or sleep deprivation, or if you have qualms about the use of such techniques on prisoners and other elaborate surgical procedures on bodies of enemy KIAs, the movie 'Inglorious Bastards' will solve this moral dilemma for you once and for all. It's OK, ladies and gentlemen. It's perfectly acceptable to fleece the body of a dead enemy combatant of his scalp using a serrated knife. And if you happen to have fantasies about beating the shit out of your enemy's prisoners of war (really beating the shit out of them, like till their bowels recoil out of their abdomens and the excrement spout out in full force), then Inglorious Bastards is the movie to see to visualize those troubling fantasies. And, last but not least, if you are obsessed with fires and arson (I would have said 'ovens', but that would carry bad implications, wouldn't it?), then have a look. Not your normal fires, mind you, but ones that can be carried out in a controlled environment (i.e. locked-in movie theater) where you can grill your enemy to death.
You're thinking permanent body damage? are you into mutilation? No problem, sir. Pull out that knife once again and let's play a little game with the Nazi prisoner. Let's mark him for life; with a little incision of a swastika on the forehead. That shall make his future civilian life miserable and guarantee him constant persecution, even if he happen to denounce the ideology, who cares? Because you NEED to spread fear and terror amongst the rank and file of your enemy.
Al Qaeda doesn't look so bad all of the sudden. You're almost one step away from a beheading scene in Inglorious Bastard.
Oh wait, this could be it, no? it's probably felt that the western population, in general, is getting a little 'pussified' so someone must toughen them up? Yeah, you almost need a conspiracy theory to digest this movie.
But you've got to love the 'Jewish Revenge' thing: think 'Vigilante Justice', then add superiority complex, a victim syndrome, a movie industry and flexible history chapters.
This movie, ladies and gentlemen, is ingloriously ridiculous.
You're thinking permanent body damage? are you into mutilation? No problem, sir. Pull out that knife once again and let's play a little game with the Nazi prisoner. Let's mark him for life; with a little incision of a swastika on the forehead. That shall make his future civilian life miserable and guarantee him constant persecution, even if he happen to denounce the ideology, who cares? Because you NEED to spread fear and terror amongst the rank and file of your enemy.
Al Qaeda doesn't look so bad all of the sudden. You're almost one step away from a beheading scene in Inglorious Bastard.
Oh wait, this could be it, no? it's probably felt that the western population, in general, is getting a little 'pussified' so someone must toughen them up? Yeah, you almost need a conspiracy theory to digest this movie.
But you've got to love the 'Jewish Revenge' thing: think 'Vigilante Justice', then add superiority complex, a victim syndrome, a movie industry and flexible history chapters.
This movie, ladies and gentlemen, is ingloriously ridiculous.
Thursday, September 24, 2009
'Panorama' Building Collapse
I wonder how I'd missed this story. Not my fault, believe me. At the time it was buried deep underneath layers of media frenzy about the opening of the Metro, and eventually got lost in the furor.
The same story was reported in the Arabic press. Al Emarat Alyoum carried the story one day later but with much more details. It'd become instantly obvious to me that the Arabic reporter is better acquainted with Engineering terms and procedures than the GN's reporter. Or he'd been simply given more freedom. (the disparaties between what's being said in the Arabic press and the English press here in the UAE are quite noticeable; Arabic press is usually much more bold with regards to local stories, but that's a subject for another post).
The article in Al Emarat Alyoum had quoted Mr. Lootah as saying that an investigation into a building collapse would usually address four main issues:
1- Faults in design.
2- Faults in selection of materials (sub-standard material).
3- Faults in installation methods.
4- Disregard for major elements like the existence of groundwater or traffic vibrations.
Lootah then said that the first THREE reasons were present in the collapse of this building.
Now that's interesting.
The GN's article on the other hand had described the investigation as 'three-pronged approach'. I'm not an expert on investigating building collapses (let alone collapses under construction), but I'd say that the fourth element as described in the Arabic article is part of the design process itself.
Another thing is of note here too: while the GN's succinct article says that the full investigative report will not be released to the media until it'd been seen by the executive council (of the Municipality?), two days later another article in the Maktoob Business News website states that police will not launch a 'criminal investigation' into the collapse.
Since there were, thankfully, no victims in the collapse, the police's decision probably means that of all the parties involved (contractor, consultant, owner, insurer..etc..), no one had pressed charges. It also means, that the matter will most probably not be investigated by a third party (apart from the Municipality). And that the Municipality will be given the job of cleaning up the mess and ensuring as best as they could that the mistakes or oversights will not take place again.
Finally, and to put things in perspective, it's important to remember two things:
1- All three of the stages that were found to be faulty, are actually 'checked' and 'approved' by the Municipality at one point or the other. The building design, as I mentioned earlier, will usually get checked by more than one engineer. And then, contractors are obliged to submit samples of construction materials, be them steel or concrete, to licensed labs to examine them. The result will then be 'seen' by an inspector engineer from DM. The installation method (or what we call 'construction method statement') will also be 'checked' by a DM engineer during the design.
2- This building was of a steel structure. Pre-engineered steel structures aren't usually designed by consultants. They come as a design-and-build package from shoddy D&B CONtractors. (Hello? who's a D&B among my readers?!). Steel suppliers and installers have their own softwares and calculation methods to which we're not privy. My structural colleague here tells me that although we as consultants check and go through all the calculations, we can't determine for sure whether a structure is serviceable to the purpose or not. The reason is that these are specialty jobs. You want to be 100% sure about the design then you'd have to sit beside the supplier's designer and through the whole process of design. That, usually, doesn't happen. At least not at a low-profile consultancy like ours!
The Real Nick will probably tell you that I'm absolving the consultants from responsibility here. I'm not. I'm sure now that DM was given free rein to amend the situation, some blood will have to flow. Amongst those who'd screwed up, the consultants will get severely reprimanded. In extreme cases they might get their license revoked. The least they'd be obliged to do is kick their structural engineer on the butt and show him the door (or the airport).
As for the contractor, don't even ask. As I said above, since this is a specialty job, the actual responsibility falls upon the specialist. Hence, I'd expect that they'd get the main brunt of DM wrath.
And given how DM is involved, albeit in a remote, supervisory role in the building process; some internal house-cleaning might also be in order.
The collapse of a Deira building last month was found to be caused by faults in its design, engineering and building materials, said Hussain Lootah, director general of Dubai Municipality, on Sunday.
....
He said the investigation had a three-pronged approach, focusing on design, engineering and the building material used, "as well as some other aspects such as whether there was ground water beneath the building."
....
"There were faults found in all three of the categories," he said. "There was an engineering fault, misuse of building materials, and the structure of the building was found to be weak. That is evident from the fact that the building collapsed on itself from its middle."
The same story was reported in the Arabic press. Al Emarat Alyoum carried the story one day later but with much more details. It'd become instantly obvious to me that the Arabic reporter is better acquainted with Engineering terms and procedures than the GN's reporter. Or he'd been simply given more freedom. (the disparaties between what's being said in the Arabic press and the English press here in the UAE are quite noticeable; Arabic press is usually much more bold with regards to local stories, but that's a subject for another post).
The article in Al Emarat Alyoum had quoted Mr. Lootah as saying that an investigation into a building collapse would usually address four main issues:
1- Faults in design.
2- Faults in selection of materials (sub-standard material).
3- Faults in installation methods.
4- Disregard for major elements like the existence of groundwater or traffic vibrations.
Lootah then said that the first THREE reasons were present in the collapse of this building.
Now that's interesting.
The GN's article on the other hand had described the investigation as 'three-pronged approach'. I'm not an expert on investigating building collapses (let alone collapses under construction), but I'd say that the fourth element as described in the Arabic article is part of the design process itself.
Another thing is of note here too: while the GN's succinct article says that the full investigative report will not be released to the media until it'd been seen by the executive council (of the Municipality?), two days later another article in the Maktoob Business News website states that police will not launch a 'criminal investigation' into the collapse.
Since there were, thankfully, no victims in the collapse, the police's decision probably means that of all the parties involved (contractor, consultant, owner, insurer..etc..), no one had pressed charges. It also means, that the matter will most probably not be investigated by a third party (apart from the Municipality). And that the Municipality will be given the job of cleaning up the mess and ensuring as best as they could that the mistakes or oversights will not take place again.
Finally, and to put things in perspective, it's important to remember two things:
1- All three of the stages that were found to be faulty, are actually 'checked' and 'approved' by the Municipality at one point or the other. The building design, as I mentioned earlier, will usually get checked by more than one engineer. And then, contractors are obliged to submit samples of construction materials, be them steel or concrete, to licensed labs to examine them. The result will then be 'seen' by an inspector engineer from DM. The installation method (or what we call 'construction method statement') will also be 'checked' by a DM engineer during the design.
2- This building was of a steel structure. Pre-engineered steel structures aren't usually designed by consultants. They come as a design-and-build package from shoddy D&B CONtractors. (Hello? who's a D&B among my readers?!). Steel suppliers and installers have their own softwares and calculation methods to which we're not privy. My structural colleague here tells me that although we as consultants check and go through all the calculations, we can't determine for sure whether a structure is serviceable to the purpose or not. The reason is that these are specialty jobs. You want to be 100% sure about the design then you'd have to sit beside the supplier's designer and through the whole process of design. That, usually, doesn't happen. At least not at a low-profile consultancy like ours!
The Real Nick will probably tell you that I'm absolving the consultants from responsibility here. I'm not. I'm sure now that DM was given free rein to amend the situation, some blood will have to flow. Amongst those who'd screwed up, the consultants will get severely reprimanded. In extreme cases they might get their license revoked. The least they'd be obliged to do is kick their structural engineer on the butt and show him the door (or the airport).
As for the contractor, don't even ask. As I said above, since this is a specialty job, the actual responsibility falls upon the specialist. Hence, I'd expect that they'd get the main brunt of DM wrath.
And given how DM is involved, albeit in a remote, supervisory role in the building process; some internal house-cleaning might also be in order.
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Synagogue doubles as mosque during Ramadan
‘Here is a story that shatters the stereotype’ of Jewish-Muslim conflictSince this blog has always been about tolerance and acceptance of all others. And since I always feel uneasy about ratcheting up the rhetoric of animousity even with my darnest enemies. And to smoothen the hostility of my latest post (albeit warranted), I couldn't resist but post this article when I came across it.
On Friday afternoons, the people coming to pray at this building take off their shoes, unfurl rugs to kneel on and pray in Arabic. The ones that come Friday evenings put on yarmulkes, light candles and pray in Hebrew.
The building is a synagogue on a tree-lined street in suburban Virginia, but for the past few weeks — during the Muslim holy month of Ramadan — it has also been doubling daily as a mosque. Synagogue members suggested their building after hearing the Muslim congregation was looking to rent a place for overflow crowds.
This is so fan-fucking-tastic.
Now, do I dare suggest that we try something similar here in the Middle East?
Facebook Bias, Zuckerberg, Golan Heights And Illegal Settlements
The Golan Heights are Syrian territories currently occupied by ' Israel'. The occupiers, after they'd wrecked havoc on the area and caused a massive exodus of Syrian Arabs, had built few settlements there on the heights. 'Israel' was always quick to infest all the Arab terrorises that it'd occupied with settlements, except maybe for the deserts of Sinai Peninsula (surprise surprise). There are probably strategic reasons behind establishing these settlements on lands that 'Israel' realize it'd have to withdraw from sooner or later (the hard or the soft way).
Usually, when an illegal Jewish settlement is being dismantled (as we've seen in Gaza), there will be camera crews from every fucking news network in the world. Reporting on the agony of the Jewish people being persecuted for the gazillion time. I remember with teary eyes how some settlers were holed up in one of the synagogues while the Israeli soldiers begged them to leave. Even the BBC was there to record in minute details the tearful departure. I say tearful because it was freaking hilarious. I mean, these guys come and occupy the land and install illegal settlements and then expect everybody to sympathize with them when they have to leave?
Give me a break.
So, somewhere in the near future, when the illegal, venomous, cancerous Jewish settlers on the Golan heights will be forced to leave, there will be camera crews to catch all the misery. I'll sure be watching in glee.
The strategic reasons are not only limited to using the settlers as negotiation and propaganda chips. There are also economical reasons. The fertile lands of Golan are being heavily exploited by the settlers. To cite only one example, there are numerous wineries that turn its grape, harvested from the best vineyards, into wine that will be labeled as a 'product of Israel' and exported to Europe. You have probably heard of the gracious Greek parliamentarian who refused a bottle of wine as a gift from the 'Israeli' ambassador and ripped him apart in a polite letter.
Now, the Jewish settlers in Golan, like the settlers in Hebron and the West Bank, are the lowest form of low-life bottom-feeding scum. It wasn't enough for them that the land on which they'd built their residences has been obtained by theft. No. They also want the world to be so 'cool' and 'understanding' about it. They got butt-hurt when Facebook wouldn't show their 'hometowns' as located in 'Israel', but rather showed them as located in Syria.
They made a Facebook group, demanding that Facebook changes this status. Here's the description of this group:
The group mustered a whopping 2500 members. Unlike other Facebook groups where members had reached hundred of thousands for more rightful (and less frivolous) causes, this group had the support of a media watchdog that goes by the name of 'Honest Reporting'. They must have together mobilized the Zionist lobby in the US too. Facebook had eventually acquiesced to the pressure, and included an option in the hometown placement (in the account settings) for the Jewish settlements in Golan Heights to be located in 'Israel'.
They had a sound logic, no? I mean, look at the settlement of the west bank! they don't appear to be located in Palestine! Illegal as they may be, they should have the option of belonging to Israel!
The Facebook group, after they'd 'won' the altercation with Facebook, had this to say about the 'victorious' verdict:
Actually, HonestReporting is not even apologetic about it. Their headline about the matter reads "HR's campaign forces a change of policy."
In return, Syria had decided to block facebook. I thought this was hilarious since I believe Facebook is already blocked in Syria (?). Like, how many times do you block facebook? I believe blocking a website is a binary state. You either block it or unblock it, and once you block it, you can't block it more than it's already blocked.
Syria needs to find better ways to fight its PR battles.
Usually, when an illegal Jewish settlement is being dismantled (as we've seen in Gaza), there will be camera crews from every fucking news network in the world. Reporting on the agony of the Jewish people being persecuted for the gazillion time. I remember with teary eyes how some settlers were holed up in one of the synagogues while the Israeli soldiers begged them to leave. Even the BBC was there to record in minute details the tearful departure. I say tearful because it was freaking hilarious. I mean, these guys come and occupy the land and install illegal settlements and then expect everybody to sympathize with them when they have to leave?
Give me a break.
So, somewhere in the near future, when the illegal, venomous, cancerous Jewish settlers on the Golan heights will be forced to leave, there will be camera crews to catch all the misery. I'll sure be watching in glee.
The strategic reasons are not only limited to using the settlers as negotiation and propaganda chips. There are also economical reasons. The fertile lands of Golan are being heavily exploited by the settlers. To cite only one example, there are numerous wineries that turn its grape, harvested from the best vineyards, into wine that will be labeled as a 'product of Israel' and exported to Europe. You have probably heard of the gracious Greek parliamentarian who refused a bottle of wine as a gift from the 'Israeli' ambassador and ripped him apart in a polite letter.
Now, the Jewish settlers in Golan, like the settlers in Hebron and the West Bank, are the lowest form of low-life bottom-feeding scum. It wasn't enough for them that the land on which they'd built their residences has been obtained by theft. No. They also want the world to be so 'cool' and 'understanding' about it. They got butt-hurt when Facebook wouldn't show their 'hometowns' as located in 'Israel', but rather showed them as located in Syria.
They made a Facebook group, demanding that Facebook changes this status. Here's the description of this group:
Although the Golan falls under Israeli law, residents of the region wishing to write "Israel" in the Hometown section of their profiles are not give the option.
For example, if someone from Qazrin fills in the Hometown space, the only option will be "Qazrin, Syria." The same is true for all of the other Jewish towns, including Ramat Magshimim, Geshur, Mevo Hanna, and Had Nes.
It is not for Facebook to decide the national origin of Golan residents. At the very least, Facebook must include the option of writing "Israel" in the hometown section, as it has done with Jewish residents of the West Bank.
Mark Zuckerberg, founder and CEO of Facebook.
The group mustered a whopping 2500 members. Unlike other Facebook groups where members had reached hundred of thousands for more rightful (and less frivolous) causes, this group had the support of a media watchdog that goes by the name of 'Honest Reporting'. They must have together mobilized the Zionist lobby in the US too. Facebook had eventually acquiesced to the pressure, and included an option in the hometown placement (in the account settings) for the Jewish settlements in Golan Heights to be located in 'Israel'.
They had a sound logic, no? I mean, look at the settlement of the west bank! they don't appear to be located in Palestine! Illegal as they may be, they should have the option of belonging to Israel!
The Facebook group, after they'd 'won' the altercation with Facebook, had this to say about the 'victorious' verdict:
Thanks to all of the members of this group, Facebook has changed its settings on the hometown section of people's profiles. Facebook has now applied the same policy for Golan residents as it does for the West Bank. When people scroll down, they will see the name of the town with Israel written below it, identifying it as part of Israel.Although I'm totally disgusted, but I'm not really surprised. It's not because Mark Zuckerberg, the founder and CEO of Facebook, is a Jew himself. I don't believe this was a factor. It was just another episode of bullying performed by Israel and its lobby in Washington, probably playing the Holocaust and the White guilt cards.
However, just as with the West Bank, Golan residents still cannot choose to have the word Israel appear in the hometown line.
HonestReporting congratulates all of the members of the group for bringing about this change. We thank everyone for taking action and showing once again that individuals can make a difference.
Actually, HonestReporting is not even apologetic about it. Their headline about the matter reads "HR's campaign forces a change of policy."
In return, Syria had decided to block facebook. I thought this was hilarious since I believe Facebook is already blocked in Syria (?). Like, how many times do you block facebook? I believe blocking a website is a binary state. You either block it or unblock it, and once you block it, you can't block it more than it's already blocked.
Syria needs to find better ways to fight its PR battles.
Illegal Jewish Settlements in the Golan Heights can now belong to 'Israel'!
Facebook had some sense to keep the Arab towns of Golan as belonging only to Syria.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Dubai Metro Q & A with Ashfaq!
How can I go to Al Mazaya Center, on Shaikh Zayed Road after getting off the Financial Centre Station? Is there any feeder bus system?
Ashfaq: There is no feeder bus from Financial Centre Metro Station to Al Mazaya Centre.
........................................
I took a bus form Baniyas to the Union metro station and after I exited the bus i entered the train within 10 minutes but I was charged 1.7 extra i.e. 4.10 was deducted as the normal metro fare and an addition 1.7 was deducted. Why is that?
Ashfaq: Please complain to the RTA in case you feel that you were overcharged.
........................................
I am staying in Al Baraha area in Deira, Dubai. I want to go Palm Jumeirah. Please send me a Metro travel schedule.
Ashfaq: There is no feeder bus from Financial Centre Metro Station to Al Mazaya Centre.
(now that's an ugly cul-de-sac)
........................................
I took a bus form Baniyas to the Union metro station and after I exited the bus i entered the train within 10 minutes but I was charged 1.7 extra i.e. 4.10 was deducted as the normal metro fare and an addition 1.7 was deducted. Why is that?
Ashfaq: Please complain to the RTA in case you feel that you were overcharged.
(I think the question was whether he should feel he'd been overcharged or not?)
........................................
As it was told that bus service will be free for metro user But today I took metro from mall of emirates to Khalid bin Walid station (Burjuman) Dh4.50
Ashfaq: You need to understand the fare structure. Nothing is free. But if you take the bus or the train or both from the Mall of the Emirates to the Khalid Bin Al Waleed Station, the fare will be Dh4.50 because the two destinations fall in two different zones. For complete fare structure please visit www.gulfnews.com/metro
........................................
As it was told that bus service will be free for metro user But today I took metro from mall of emirates to Khalid bin Walid station (Burjuman) Dh4.50
Ashfaq: You need to understand the fare structure. Nothing is free. But if you take the bus or the train or both from the Mall of the Emirates to the Khalid Bin Al Waleed Station, the fare will be Dh4.50 because the two destinations fall in two different zones. For complete fare structure please visit www.gulfnews.com/metro
(but he was told it'll be free, it'll be free!)
........................................
I am staying in Al Baraha area in Deira, Dubai. I want to go Palm Jumeirah. Please send me a Metro travel schedule.
(I see, do you want a beverage with that as well?!)
Ashfaq: You can use the journey planner called Al Wojhati Service available on the RTA's website and plan your journey.
........................................
Simple question: Who built the metro? I mean was it Japanese or Korean company.
Ashfaq: The Metro is being built by Dubai Rapid Link (DURL) Consortium which comprises Japanese companies including Mitsubishi Heavy Industries, Mitsubishi Corporation, Obayashi Corporation, Kajima Corporation and the Turkish company Yapi Merkezi.
........................................
Can u tell the official website of Dubai Metro?
Ashfaq: www.rta.ae
Ashfaq: You can use the journey planner called Al Wojhati Service available on the RTA's website and plan your journey.
(however, and in a reply to another question later on, Ashfaq admitted that the Wojhati service is still being updated with Metro Info)
........................................
I just need to now[sic] if I did shopping and I need to travel by metro how many bags I can carry in the metro?
Ashfaq: You can take as many shopping bags as you can carry but not the shopping trolley.
........................................
I just need to now[sic] if I did shopping and I need to travel by metro how many bags I can carry in the metro?
Ashfaq: You can take as many shopping bags as you can carry but not the shopping trolley.
(what if I can carry the trolley?)
........................................
How do you cross the Track from one walkway to the other side?
Ashfaq: There are walkways built inside the station to go across the track.
How do you cross the Track from one walkway to the other side?
Ashfaq: There are walkways built inside the station to go across the track.
(duh, you swing it from one ceiling rafter to the other like a chimp!)
........................................
Simple question: Who built the metro? I mean was it Japanese or Korean company.
Ashfaq: The Metro is being built by Dubai Rapid Link (DURL) Consortium which comprises Japanese companies including Mitsubishi Heavy Industries, Mitsubishi Corporation, Obayashi Corporation, Kajima Corporation and the Turkish company Yapi Merkezi.
(simplicity FTW)
........................................
Can u tell the official website of Dubai Metro?
Ashfaq: www.rta.ae
(I thought this was the website for all MODES of transbort?)
........................................
Drinking is prohibited in metro. Not even water. Why cant you allow water. Is there any harm in that. (sob, sob)
Ashfaq: This is an RTA rule. (!!)
Drinking is prohibited in metro. Not even water. Why cant you allow water. Is there any harm in that. (sob, sob)
Ashfaq: This is an RTA rule. (!!)
(do you understand or shall we ban nose picking too?)
Sunday, September 13, 2009
A Week of Blogging Against Tribalism. اسبوع التدوين السوري ضد القَبَلية
Before reading further, you may want to check out this post to understand the 'week of blogging againt... ' drift.
-The first incident occurred in the early 90s. I was probably in the tenth grade. I remember it being a spring evening, and me and the family were out sitting in the balcony. Our house was on the top floor and the balcony was expansive and had a great view of our neighborhood. Except for the cool westerly breeze, the sporadic honks of cars and the distant effeminate voice of Hani Shaker bleating from a distant cassette player, the night was quite and relaxing. We’re probably having tea or cracking nuts.
But all that quiet changed in an instant.
All of the sudden, there were animal shrieks and wailings from the street below. We jumped in our seats and rushed to see what was happening. And our balcony, as I said, afforded us a great view. From the entrance of the building across the street from us, there were dozens of people shuffling around, at first I thought they were escaping a fire, but then it turned out most of them were hurrying inside.
There were dozens of young men of various ages. Few seconds later the pandemonium moved out of the building and on to the blacktop, and only then it occurred to me that a big fight was underway. More and more people were now trickling out of the building, and it was impossible to tell who was on whose side. It was funny in a way, except for the blood that soon started flowing in the gutter. Glistening under the ancient neon street light.
No one died, though. The thugs from both sides had enough sense not to use knives. The police soon came and rounded up everybody like a herd. It turned out (and word on an Arab street travels faster than through a fiber optic cable,) it turned out that someone had lattash (verbally harassed or flirted with) somebody’s sister. And the tension was building up between the neighbors since. Both sides promised to mobilized their next of kin and attack the other side viciously.
Tribalism.
-I was probably at my second year in college. Don’t recall the exact year, but somewhere in the late 90s. A “university party” for those who are not familiar with it: is an event usually held in a large theatre. A group of self-acclaimed comedians from a certain college will feature parody sketches and spoofs of popular songs tweaked to mock the university life or some of the teachers.
Anyway, me and couple of friends were attending this huge party at the civil engineering faculty (their group was good) and all of the sudden a fight erupted between a guy from Aleppo (my home town, and the city where this was all happening) and a guy from Dair al Zour (a city in the eastern part of Syria, close to Iraq). But since the party was underway, the two fighting yobs were soon restrained and kept apart. But the guy from Dair Al Zour wasn’t happy. He stood at the entrance to the theatre before the end of the party and was having a word or two with every other guy from Dair Al Zour who was about to leave. “Faz3a”**, seemed to be the code word. The boys from the eastern city had a strong presence on the campus and in all the parties. Soon he was having 30 good fighters under his command.
The couple of guys on the other side of the battle didn’t seem to expect a big fight, or bothered to mobilize anyone. So when the fight had started, there was no comparison. The playfield wasn’t only uneven: it was vertical. The poor guy went down quickly and started crawling under a barrage of kicks. You’d think the gang beating him would realize it’s no feat on their part to keep beating him. But they didn’t, since it’s a “faz3a”, they kept at it, the beating didn’t stop until he managed to dive beneath a car. He stayed there. The gang was soon dispersed after they’d realized they couldn’t kick him anymore.
Tribalism.
-Muzafar Al Nawab is an accomplished Iraqi poet. But this is not the only reason why Arab youth love him. His poetry is explicit and border on the pornographic. How could he not be famous then? And hence, when we (me and couple of friends) saw a big banner advertising an evening of poetry with Muzafar Al Nawab, we rushed to buy tickets. This was around the early 2000s. the poetry reading was to be held in the largest auditorium in Aleppo University (Mudaraj Al Teb). There were few thousands people, most of them on their feet. Such was the intensity of admiration for Al Nawab poetry.
As always, Al Nawab kept his audience captivated with the use of words such as “sons of the bitches” “anus” “cock” “vaginal cavity”.. etc .. there was also the sub plot of cheering for the liberation of Palestine. But in retrospect, the poetry recitation must have been too exciting and ‘firebrand’ for some. Because once he left the theatre, a big fight erupted in the lobby between a group of Palestinian students and a group of Dair Al Azourian students. Somebody stabbed somebody and the wounded fell to the ground writhing in pain and blood. When the courageous warriors saw the blood they all fled the scene. It’s amazing that even within their fits of rage they were aware that stabbing on campus was a national security issue.
Tribalism.
-I was away from Aleppo but I heard all about it (since, again, word travels faster in an Arab street than through a fire optic cable). One retired hot shot in Aleppo was visiting a relative of his in some hospital. The relative was wounded during a ‘liquidation’ job of a guy in a rival family. The thugs from the family whose member was liquidated knew about this visit and were prepared for it. Men armed with sub-machine guns descended upon the hospital and sprayed ‘rash’ the former hotshot and his entourage in one of the waiting rooms. The entourage were armed and they fired back. It was another spectacle that Aleppo will remember for years to come. The hot shot got injured in the feet and soon flew to Europe to escape a certain death. Such was the viciousness and the thuggery of the other Mafioso family.
These events were narrated to me when I was on vacation. When I dug a little deeper and enquired, it turned out that the essential conflict between the Costa Nostras had started over a turf dispute in the cattle market.
The cattle market for God sake.
Tribalism.
____________________________________
* Don't let the irony be lost on you.
**How do you translate that?
Saturday, September 12, 2009
What Happened in London on 9/11
There is a racist organization that goes by the name: "Stop Islamification of Europe"
Check out their website, there are few valuable gems in there:
http://sioe.wordpress.com/
Written at the top is: "Racism is the lowest form of human stupidity, but Islamophobia is the height of common sense"
So these friendly sorts from SIOE have decided to protest the evil Islamification of Europe by arranging a demonstration outside a London mosque on 9/11. Word has got out to the Muslim community, and hundreds of Muslim youth gathered for a counter-demonstration.
The top organizer of the demonstration from the SIOE side had called it off at the eleventh hour. Claiming that the police were scared of the Muslim youth and didn't want to get killed.
The angry Muslim youth gathered anyway. Pumped and prepped for a fist fight. But their counterparts didn't show up, so what they do?
They clash with the police.
The racist Islamophobes couldn't have dreamed up a better scenario.
One has to wonder though, if your opponents didn't show up, why did you have to clash with the police? why there's always a tendency in the Muslim youth to get angry and erupt? why are they (we) always on a short fuse?
Get laid anyone?
I do not blame the 'gentlemen' from SIOE. They are entitled to their fascism. I blame the naive young Muslim men for their rash and uncontrolled behavior, and for being duped into a fight with the police who were originally there to protect the Mosque.
Way to mark the anniversary of the 9/11 events.
Check out their website, there are few valuable gems in there:
http://sioe.wordpress.com/
Written at the top is: "Racism is the lowest form of human stupidity, but Islamophobia is the height of common sense"
How refreshing.
And then there's the "Support Israel" and "Support Serbian Cosovo" banners. There's also a caricature of a mosque adorned with the face of a pirate warrior, clad with metal helmet, et al. The entire website speaks for itself. Thinly veiled racism and Islamophobia.
So these friendly sorts from SIOE have decided to protest the evil Islamification of Europe by arranging a demonstration outside a London mosque on 9/11. Word has got out to the Muslim community, and hundreds of Muslim youth gathered for a counter-demonstration.
The top organizer of the demonstration from the SIOE side had called it off at the eleventh hour. Claiming that the police were scared of the Muslim youth and didn't want to get killed.
The angry Muslim youth gathered anyway. Pumped and prepped for a fist fight. But their counterparts didn't show up, so what they do?
They clash with the police.
The racist Islamophobes couldn't have dreamed up a better scenario.
One has to wonder though, if your opponents didn't show up, why did you have to clash with the police? why there's always a tendency in the Muslim youth to get angry and erupt? why are they (we) always on a short fuse?
Why couldn't they, as one stand-up comedian put it: just sit down, relax, have a cup of tea, and listen to a Cat Stevens recording?
Get laid anyone?
I do not blame the 'gentlemen' from SIOE. They are entitled to their fascism. I blame the naive young Muslim men for their rash and uncontrolled behavior, and for being duped into a fight with the police who were originally there to protect the Mosque.
Way to mark the anniversary of the 9/11 events.
............
Edit:
As Sasa rightly points out in the comments' section, the SIOE calimed they had called off the protest. I stand corrected.
Thursday, September 10, 2009
The Dubai Metro and the CFS: Part 2
There must be hundreds of blog posts about Dubai metro and its grand opening by now. And you know I don’t like crowds. So I ain’t talking about that here.
However, make sure to check out my friends Mory’s and KJ’s posts on how we brought Twitter down on its knees by pushing the #dubaimetro hatch tag to the top of the trending topics.
…..
There are, on the other hand, some skeptics of the Dubai Metro (hereinafter referred to as the naysayers). They opine that just because the Metro had exceeded budget then the RTA (road and transport authority in Dubai) didn’t really do anything special.
As an engineer, I’m genuinely convinced that the RTA has done a very good job on the Metro. The magnitude of money invested in a project is not always a guarantor that it will come out nicely. Let’s remember that the RTA is an infant organization, it’s only been established few years ago. And it’s been put at the helm of one of the biggest transportation projects in the region (if not in the world) instantly.
So RTA: kudos for a work properly done, you deserve all the praise you could get.
Also, one of the repeated choruses of the skeptics is that RTA had everything on a golden platter that they didn’t have to do anything. That the Metro had its lead consultants, sub-consultants, projects’ managers ..etc.. and all RTA had to do was sit down and watch. This, of course, is bullshit. Not a single private enterprise can play the role of a government transport authority. I did tell you in an earlier post of this friend of mine who worked for the Syrian railways. Well, it may not be a valid comparison to cite the Chemen de Fer de Syriane as a reference, but it’s certainly useful to bring up few points. Let me elaborate.
All of the Syrian railway tracks, even the ones constructed in the late 70s, are done with nuts and bolts. You’re probably wondering: so what? Almost everything else in the world, from aircraft carriers to lawnmowers are fastened that way. That is true, except that there are few implications that makes this a significant issue.
When fixed with nuts and bolts, the rails are literally wedged to the concrete sleepers underneath. They have no room to move and nowhere to go. This is essentially good and well, because we want to keep the rails in parallel lines so that the train doesn't derail. The problem, though, is that the rails are made of steel, and steel is subject to expansion and contraction due to fluctuation of temperature. This obliged the early days railway designers to provide expansion joints at short intervals (20-30 meters). So one rail is 20-30 meters long and it’s totally independent from the next one. When two consecutive rails expand under the heat, it’s impossible for their tip ends to match when they meet. And when they're not expanded, there's a visible gap between them. This, in turn, forces the trains to run at a speed no more than 120 km per hour. Because more speed will result in jerking and bouncing due to the differences at the joints’ ends. And this is why our trains in Syria aren’t anything like the Shinkansen (the Bullet Train) of Japan.
It also accounts, if you may have notcied, to the clunk-clunk-pause-clunk-clunk-pause, sound of the convenstional trains.
So for the last ten years, the Syrian Railways has been trying to replace the old tracks, or some of them, with Pandrol clips.
Many European companies were called to study and offer designs for the new tracks. My friend, who wasn't a counterpart to any of the Europeans, did nontheless have a glimpse into the way the CFS interacted with them. According to him, there was a lot of confusion. Many quiries went unanswered. Many assumptions were made. And stacks upon stacks of drawings and paper were produced and eventually shelved.
So far, I'm not aware of a single track in Syria that has been upgraded. And without the upgrade, the trains will still run slow and jerky and will not attract many passengers.
With regrets and bitterness, I'm convinced that the main problem for the Syrian railways is incompetence. It's certainly not funds. The CFS is usually allocated a good budget. And even for a fiscally struggling country like Syria, when it comes to landmark projects, hard money will be scraped from here and there and put together. (remember the Euphrates dam and the Aleppo - Lattakia railway tracks in the 70s). Furthermore, there are many European financiers and donors who were eager to fund such projects. The revival of the old Orient Express is a vital and strategic venture for many of them. (for reasons too vague to explain, or too painfully obvious to mention)
The problem is certainly not the funds. It's incompetence: old, uninspired, stinking and outrageous incomptence.
You'd think that a country that has century old engineering colleges and bright academics who write regularly for interntaional engineering periodicals, you'd think that mobilizing expertise shouldn't be a problem. But it unfortunately is. And the reasons are clear and compelling to everyone who's acquianted with the conditions of public employment in Syria: the income of an average Syrian engineer in the public sector is very low. There is hardly any system of reward for hard or distinguished work. There are vanguards who have grown long and robust roots and who are hell bent on keeping things as they are. They are terrified of change because they think that anything new that they can't understand will bring them down somehow. So they fight teeth and nails to sustain the status quo.
You could more or less say the same thing about the Metro project of Damascus. I'm not aware in what phase of hibernation that project currently is. But it's a long, long way from being finished. As I am told, there have been dozens of studies done on the Damascus Metro. Some of them the superficial and quick n' dirty type. Others are genuinely authentic. Japanese, Malaysian, European, Indian and even Turkish companies and consulting offices have taken a shot at the Damascus Metro at one point or the other. Nothing has come to fruition, though. Last thing I'd heard, and this comes from another friend of mine, is that a good guy with PhD in civil engineering, who had once worked on the Metro of Hanover, Germany, and who's a native of Homs, was working hard at one single tunnel track of Damascus Metro. Last I'd heard about that was on 2002, and as far as I know, nothing has come out of that as well.
Could I blame the Homsi Doctor? certainly not. I'm sure he's competent given his bio. But that, I'm afraid, isn't enough. You need to have an equivalent and competent expertise on the government side. You need to have a core working unit to steer the wheels with determination and will power. This unit must be authorized and given a carte blanche: the only way to stave out the vanguards and their underhanded ways. This unit must also be answerable to the higher-ups. Without such hard working and dedicated men, I'm convinced that Damascus Metro, let alone Aleppo's Metro, will go nowhere. Literally.
So the naysayers can find faults with the Dubai Metro wherever they wish. It doesn't matter. The Metro will plow forward and will add more lines to it in due course. A friend of mine, who was a resident of the city of Dallas in the US at the time, tells me how the naysayers in the state of Texas were so skeptical of the Metro. And they thought it was doomed to failure. Especially that Dallasites, like Dubaians, are used to their airconditioned cars. But guess what? the Dallas Metro was an instant hit. And the naysayers had enough sense to fall silent and keep their wits to themselves.
For all the above reasons, I salute and congratulate the RTA of Dubai on a job really well done. A modern Metro with international standards built in a record time. As an Arab, it brings me pride and joy to be witness to this massive achievement. And I nothing but hope that other states in the region would follow suit and get their acts together.
----------------------------
Link1: here's an article on the Pandrol system used for Dubai Metro.
Link2: here's a flash video of the Pandrol assembly used for Dubai Metro.
However, make sure to check out my friends Mory’s and KJ’s posts on how we brought Twitter down on its knees by pushing the #dubaimetro hatch tag to the top of the trending topics.
…..
There are, on the other hand, some skeptics of the Dubai Metro (hereinafter referred to as the naysayers). They opine that just because the Metro had exceeded budget then the RTA (road and transport authority in Dubai) didn’t really do anything special.
As an engineer, I’m genuinely convinced that the RTA has done a very good job on the Metro. The magnitude of money invested in a project is not always a guarantor that it will come out nicely. Let’s remember that the RTA is an infant organization, it’s only been established few years ago. And it’s been put at the helm of one of the biggest transportation projects in the region (if not in the world) instantly.
So RTA: kudos for a work properly done, you deserve all the praise you could get.
Also, one of the repeated choruses of the skeptics is that RTA had everything on a golden platter that they didn’t have to do anything. That the Metro had its lead consultants, sub-consultants, projects’ managers ..etc.. and all RTA had to do was sit down and watch. This, of course, is bullshit. Not a single private enterprise can play the role of a government transport authority. I did tell you in an earlier post of this friend of mine who worked for the Syrian railways. Well, it may not be a valid comparison to cite the Chemen de Fer de Syriane as a reference, but it’s certainly useful to bring up few points. Let me elaborate.
All of the Syrian railway tracks, even the ones constructed in the late 70s, are done with nuts and bolts. You’re probably wondering: so what? Almost everything else in the world, from aircraft carriers to lawnmowers are fastened that way. That is true, except that there are few implications that makes this a significant issue.
When fixed with nuts and bolts, the rails are literally wedged to the concrete sleepers underneath. They have no room to move and nowhere to go. This is essentially good and well, because we want to keep the rails in parallel lines so that the train doesn't derail. The problem, though, is that the rails are made of steel, and steel is subject to expansion and contraction due to fluctuation of temperature. This obliged the early days railway designers to provide expansion joints at short intervals (20-30 meters). So one rail is 20-30 meters long and it’s totally independent from the next one. When two consecutive rails expand under the heat, it’s impossible for their tip ends to match when they meet. And when they're not expanded, there's a visible gap between them. This, in turn, forces the trains to run at a speed no more than 120 km per hour. Because more speed will result in jerking and bouncing due to the differences at the joints’ ends. And this is why our trains in Syria aren’t anything like the Shinkansen (the Bullet Train) of Japan.
It also accounts, if you may have notcied, to the clunk-clunk-pause-clunk-clunk-pause, sound of the convenstional trains.
There is an alternative to the old nuts and bolts method of fixing; it’s called Pandrol (or Pandrol clips). It’s simple in shape, but complicated in action. It allows the rails to expand and move (bend) within a very controlled pace. It’s basically done so that the two parallel rails could dance together, such that they stay alligned without expansion joints. The Pandrol is also easy to install (if you’ve got the machinery, that is). And it’s not very expensive.
Pandrol Clip
Many European companies were called to study and offer designs for the new tracks. My friend, who wasn't a counterpart to any of the Europeans, did nontheless have a glimpse into the way the CFS interacted with them. According to him, there was a lot of confusion. Many quiries went unanswered. Many assumptions were made. And stacks upon stacks of drawings and paper were produced and eventually shelved.
So far, I'm not aware of a single track in Syria that has been upgraded. And without the upgrade, the trains will still run slow and jerky and will not attract many passengers.
With regrets and bitterness, I'm convinced that the main problem for the Syrian railways is incompetence. It's certainly not funds. The CFS is usually allocated a good budget. And even for a fiscally struggling country like Syria, when it comes to landmark projects, hard money will be scraped from here and there and put together. (remember the Euphrates dam and the Aleppo - Lattakia railway tracks in the 70s). Furthermore, there are many European financiers and donors who were eager to fund such projects. The revival of the old Orient Express is a vital and strategic venture for many of them. (for reasons too vague to explain, or too painfully obvious to mention)
The problem is certainly not the funds. It's incompetence: old, uninspired, stinking and outrageous incomptence.
You'd think that a country that has century old engineering colleges and bright academics who write regularly for interntaional engineering periodicals, you'd think that mobilizing expertise shouldn't be a problem. But it unfortunately is. And the reasons are clear and compelling to everyone who's acquianted with the conditions of public employment in Syria: the income of an average Syrian engineer in the public sector is very low. There is hardly any system of reward for hard or distinguished work. There are vanguards who have grown long and robust roots and who are hell bent on keeping things as they are. They are terrified of change because they think that anything new that they can't understand will bring them down somehow. So they fight teeth and nails to sustain the status quo.
You could more or less say the same thing about the Metro project of Damascus. I'm not aware in what phase of hibernation that project currently is. But it's a long, long way from being finished. As I am told, there have been dozens of studies done on the Damascus Metro. Some of them the superficial and quick n' dirty type. Others are genuinely authentic. Japanese, Malaysian, European, Indian and even Turkish companies and consulting offices have taken a shot at the Damascus Metro at one point or the other. Nothing has come to fruition, though. Last thing I'd heard, and this comes from another friend of mine, is that a good guy with PhD in civil engineering, who had once worked on the Metro of Hanover, Germany, and who's a native of Homs, was working hard at one single tunnel track of Damascus Metro. Last I'd heard about that was on 2002, and as far as I know, nothing has come out of that as well.
Could I blame the Homsi Doctor? certainly not. I'm sure he's competent given his bio. But that, I'm afraid, isn't enough. You need to have an equivalent and competent expertise on the government side. You need to have a core working unit to steer the wheels with determination and will power. This unit must be authorized and given a carte blanche: the only way to stave out the vanguards and their underhanded ways. This unit must also be answerable to the higher-ups. Without such hard working and dedicated men, I'm convinced that Damascus Metro, let alone Aleppo's Metro, will go nowhere. Literally.
So the naysayers can find faults with the Dubai Metro wherever they wish. It doesn't matter. The Metro will plow forward and will add more lines to it in due course. A friend of mine, who was a resident of the city of Dallas in the US at the time, tells me how the naysayers in the state of Texas were so skeptical of the Metro. And they thought it was doomed to failure. Especially that Dallasites, like Dubaians, are used to their airconditioned cars. But guess what? the Dallas Metro was an instant hit. And the naysayers had enough sense to fall silent and keep their wits to themselves.
For all the above reasons, I salute and congratulate the RTA of Dubai on a job really well done. A modern Metro with international standards built in a record time. As an Arab, it brings me pride and joy to be witness to this massive achievement. And I nothing but hope that other states in the region would follow suit and get their acts together.
----------------------------
Link1: here's an article on the Pandrol system used for Dubai Metro.
Link2: here's a flash video of the Pandrol assembly used for Dubai Metro.
----------------------------
Edit: here's a cool video taken today.
Tuesday, September 08, 2009
Ladies and Gents, Now You Know What to Look For in a Partner
Ask him/her for a childhood photograph; the wider they smile, the longer they are going to tolerate you on the long run.
I think it's usually OK to ask for a childhood photo, ain' it? But guys, you may want to appear casual about your request, lest the other party think you're a closet pedophile or something.
Darn, not a single photograph of me as a kid shows a smile. In fact, I was being crying my eyes out in couple of them. Not sure what point my parents were trying to make framing me like that. I remember being happy most of the time. I'll remember to ask them when I see him next.
But crying kids, particularly babies, are adorable. Aren't they? Read on.
I think it's usually OK to ask for a childhood photo, ain' it? But guys, you may want to appear casual about your request, lest the other party think you're a closet pedophile or something.
Darn, not a single photograph of me as a kid shows a smile. In fact, I was being crying my eyes out in couple of them. Not sure what point my parents were trying to make framing me like that. I remember being happy most of the time. I'll remember to ask them when I see him next.
But crying kids, particularly babies, are adorable. Aren't they? Read on.
Pictures of grinning kids may reveal more than childhood happiness: a study from DePauw University shows that how intensely people smile in childhood photographs, as indicated by crow’s feet around the eyes, predicts their adult marriage success.Aha, so there's a caveat at the end. You may end up suffering to maintain that phoney smile of yours.
According to the research, people whose smiles were weakest in snapshots from childhood through young adulthood were most likely to report being divorced in middle and old age. Among the weakest smilers in college photographs, one in four ended up divorcing, compared with one in 20 of the widest smilers. The same pattern held among even those pictured at an average age of 10.
........................
But there could be a more cynical explanation, according to Matthew Hertenstein, a psychologist at DePauw who led the new study. “Maybe people who look happier in photos show a social face to others,” he says. “Those may be the same people who are likely to put up with partners because they don’t want to appear unhappy.”
No thanks. I'm a perfectly happy single :)
Sunday, September 06, 2009
The Dubai Metro
The above title isn't unique to this blog. With a little search, you could probably find three or four other posts with the same exact title. But what sets this post apart from the rest is the purpose: I just like the title for the heck of it.
Not exactly. I'm going to be honest with you and admit that I like the title because it'd generate lots of sweet traffic. You know, with the Metro inauguration coming soon (Wed, 09/09/2009, 09:00 AM), there must be many people out there hungry for information. And "The Dubai Metro" seems like an obvious choice for a general search.
However, apart from my blatant gluttony for hits, I really have some serious questions and concerns about the Metro. But the thoughts are so jumbled in my head I can't articulate them.... Let me give it a shot:
- Like, will the Metro really be a Metro? like, will it have cars with doors at the side that slide open when the Metro comes to a stop at a station?
- Will there be stations? can I buy tickets from those stations? are there directional signs in the station? or will I get lost? will there be a public address system inside the station? or an electronic announcement board? or both?
- Will the Metro drive gas stations out of business? you know, with less people using their cars to commute, will the Duncan Donuts delivery to the station nearby my office get disrupted when the demand slows? or will they continue to supply the same number of donuts despite the slump in demand? I worry about my weight folks. Will I get fat?
- Will the Metro drive radio stations out of business? you know, when people drive their cars less, they listen to the radio less and hence the advertisement business will slow down. Or will it not? will Metro riders be more inclined to listen to the FMs on their mobile phones with the earphones smugly stuck to their heads? will they not have a better chance of sending SMSs to radio stations in this case? (like my office boy friend from the previous post (by the way, make sure to take a pause between 'boy' and 'friend' for your own sake)). Will radio stations be allow to broadcast inside the cars while the public address system is inactive? I think it's a good idea. RTA should probably try to auction this privilege to radio stations. They'll make good money.
- Will the Metro have rails? will it be air-conditioned? will shopping trolleys be allowed on board? will pets be allowed on board? will the cars be wifi enabled? I understand that eating isn't allowed on board, but how about coffee? I really wish they'd ban it too. I don't fancy one of the skanks with shaky hands spilling his Sulimany all over my laptop.
- Will planting pots be allowed on board? I'm asking this question specifically in the light that the First Gulf Bank station is pretty close to Dubai garden center.
- Shouldn't I be reimbursed the Metro fare when I present the ticket upon purchasing a cinema ticket at the Cine Star Mall of the Emirates? or wait a minute, was that where you present the movie ticket to get one more hour free parking at the mall lest you've been using the metro?
Errrgg.... I am flabbergasted and bamboozled. I need sometime to regroup.
I have many more questions, or I will have them soon, they'll be coming up in due course. But damn, I should have designated a post for each of those question. That would have generated one hell of a traffic for me this week.
Or wait, wasn't the Metro meant to curb traffic to begin with?
.... alright folks, no more questions for tonight, good night.
Not exactly. I'm going to be honest with you and admit that I like the title because it'd generate lots of sweet traffic. You know, with the Metro inauguration coming soon (Wed, 09/09/2009, 09:00 AM), there must be many people out there hungry for information. And "The Dubai Metro" seems like an obvious choice for a general search.
However, apart from my blatant gluttony for hits, I really have some serious questions and concerns about the Metro. But the thoughts are so jumbled in my head I can't articulate them.... Let me give it a shot:
- Like, will the Metro really be a Metro? like, will it have cars with doors at the side that slide open when the Metro comes to a stop at a station?
- Will there be stations? can I buy tickets from those stations? are there directional signs in the station? or will I get lost? will there be a public address system inside the station? or an electronic announcement board? or both?
- Will the Metro drive gas stations out of business? you know, with less people using their cars to commute, will the Duncan Donuts delivery to the station nearby my office get disrupted when the demand slows? or will they continue to supply the same number of donuts despite the slump in demand? I worry about my weight folks. Will I get fat?
- Will the Metro drive radio stations out of business? you know, when people drive their cars less, they listen to the radio less and hence the advertisement business will slow down. Or will it not? will Metro riders be more inclined to listen to the FMs on their mobile phones with the earphones smugly stuck to their heads? will they not have a better chance of sending SMSs to radio stations in this case? (like my office boy friend from the previous post (by the way, make sure to take a pause between 'boy' and 'friend' for your own sake)). Will radio stations be allow to broadcast inside the cars while the public address system is inactive? I think it's a good idea. RTA should probably try to auction this privilege to radio stations. They'll make good money.
- Will the Metro have rails? will it be air-conditioned? will shopping trolleys be allowed on board? will pets be allowed on board? will the cars be wifi enabled? I understand that eating isn't allowed on board, but how about coffee? I really wish they'd ban it too. I don't fancy one of the skanks with shaky hands spilling his Sulimany all over my laptop.
- Will planting pots be allowed on board? I'm asking this question specifically in the light that the First Gulf Bank station is pretty close to Dubai garden center.
- Shouldn't I be reimbursed the Metro fare when I present the ticket upon purchasing a cinema ticket at the Cine Star Mall of the Emirates? or wait a minute, was that where you present the movie ticket to get one more hour free parking at the mall lest you've been using the metro?
Errrgg.... I am flabbergasted and bamboozled. I need sometime to regroup.
I have many more questions, or I will have them soon, they'll be coming up in due course. But damn, I should have designated a post for each of those question. That would have generated one hell of a traffic for me this week.
Or wait, wasn't the Metro meant to curb traffic to begin with?
.... alright folks, no more questions for tonight, good night.
Saturday, September 05, 2009
Vin Prizez
We have an army of keepers in our office. They’re operatively known as ‘office boys’. They wear uniforms, which makes them look rather like flunkies. (as one client once remarked to me).
One of them, someone who works for an entirely different company (but within the same group), walked up to my colleagues desk once, which is next to mine, and asked him whether he knows when the camel race is on.
My colleague, who’s an Iraqi, spent several moments trying to understand the odd request. He then denied any knowledge of any camel race and the office keeper, as I expected, came to my desk and asked in a horribly halting Arabic whether I know when the camel race is.
Why do you want to know? I asked. (I wouldn’t tell him I don’t know straightforward, I’m an A hole like that)
He said, again in a horribly halting and mutilated Arabic, that he wants to send an SMS.
SMS about what? I inquired. Although it’d become clear enough for me to guess.
SMS about the “first camel” as he’d put it, in his appallingly hideous Arabic.
I don’t know nothing about camel race, I said.
He left. Possibly fishing for other Arabic speaking, camel loving Arabs in the building.
Another colleague today tells me that three out of the six awards for Al Freej-style daily riddles have been won by Indians so far in Ramadan. I’m not jealous. I congratulate them all on a work well-done (which invariably includes a charged & credited mobile phone and a punching finger). I just want to know how they do it, even though when the questions are related to UAE heritage and are IN ARABIC. Is there a secret network of informants that go on around asking questions in halting Arabic and then collect and collate the answers and fire them all over the community so that the Shabab can send SMSs and win prizes?
I’d like to be enlightened….
Friday, September 04, 2009
Valparaiso: an Architect's Dream
Often I'd asked myself: how do I envisage the perfect city? Where could it be located? how could it evolve? What kind of dominant architecurtal style could it have?
On the matter of Urban Development and Town Planning, there are two things of notes that could lead to minor disasters:
1) Excessive regulations on the part of the city authorities always lead to monotony and boredom.
Aleppo is a very fine example of this. The first building manual was issued on 1972 (if I remembered correctly), it was a small booklet of 25 pages. By the year 2000, its amendments amounted to 400 pages. The strict building code was good to rein in the greedy builders, but it produced the most monotonous city ever built. Have a look here, and here. This is one of the affluent neighbourhoods. It's called New Aleppo. The building code allows for two floors. You see boxes clad in stone (beautifully ornate as it they may be), with balconies all around. The only window for creativity being how to throw around columns at the perimeter. Builders spend six month erecting the structure and then go on for years cutting, trimming, sculpting, beveling and embossing pieces of stone together in tacky intricate designs. It's unbelievably lame and uninspiring. Other areas, where the building codes allows for 5 floors, are even more hideous.
2)Lack of regulations, corruption, poverty or lenient enforcement of zoning regulations could lead to chaos, shanty towns and neighbourhoods with open sewer and unhappy children.
There are many evidence of this. Take the Palestinian refugee camps in Lebanon for instance. They started out as tent cities to host refugees, and when it turned out the stay would be long and the tents won't do, the haphazard building process had started. This is also true for many of the slums around the middle east and other developing countries. The outcome is unpleasant to say the least. The buildings are so bunched up together that natural light and ventilation are a rarity.
Usually, even when an architect like myself makes a statement that is, for some, deemed political (like the cruelty of living in slums and the need to get rid of them), we do acknowledge that the matter is much bigger than the realm of urban planning. Town planners and architect MIGHT be able to tell you what's wrong and what's right. Or how to make a wrong right. but we can't tell you how to get the funds to make it.
So is there must a compromise between heavy regulation and chaotic evolution? I believe there is. There are cities around the world that had developed with the least involvement of city authorities. I'm not suggesting that regulations will always have a negative impact, far from it. But the planner should allow for fair amount of creativity on the part of the architects. Decentralize municipal control and allow communities to organize themselves locally.
This is best seen in an organic development of a city. There will be a focal point, be it a seaport, an airport, a dam, an industrial complex..etc.. And around that focal point the city will grow. Now, imagine if that focal point is linear in shape, like a sea front, and that it takes a meandering course along one side of the city. Now, add to that an array of hills, canyons and winding ridges, all gently sloping down to the sea front. Let's also envision a breath-taking natural scenery of green forests that the city planners and residents are conscious not to utterly murder. Coincidentally, let's suppose that architects and residents are adamant on painting their buildings and houses in an endless spectrum of colors that defies order and challenge the scenery around it for the attention of the beholder.
Finally, imagine cable cares and the first public library in South America.
Imagine the great pacific ocean as an imposing background for all the above setting.
You get Valparaiso!
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On the matter of Urban Development and Town Planning, there are two things of notes that could lead to minor disasters:
1) Excessive regulations on the part of the city authorities always lead to monotony and boredom.
Aleppo is a very fine example of this. The first building manual was issued on 1972 (if I remembered correctly), it was a small booklet of 25 pages. By the year 2000, its amendments amounted to 400 pages. The strict building code was good to rein in the greedy builders, but it produced the most monotonous city ever built. Have a look here, and here. This is one of the affluent neighbourhoods. It's called New Aleppo. The building code allows for two floors. You see boxes clad in stone (beautifully ornate as it they may be), with balconies all around. The only window for creativity being how to throw around columns at the perimeter. Builders spend six month erecting the structure and then go on for years cutting, trimming, sculpting, beveling and embossing pieces of stone together in tacky intricate designs. It's unbelievably lame and uninspiring. Other areas, where the building codes allows for 5 floors, are even more hideous.
2)Lack of regulations, corruption, poverty or lenient enforcement of zoning regulations could lead to chaos, shanty towns and neighbourhoods with open sewer and unhappy children.
There are many evidence of this. Take the Palestinian refugee camps in Lebanon for instance. They started out as tent cities to host refugees, and when it turned out the stay would be long and the tents won't do, the haphazard building process had started. This is also true for many of the slums around the middle east and other developing countries. The outcome is unpleasant to say the least. The buildings are so bunched up together that natural light and ventilation are a rarity.
Usually, even when an architect like myself makes a statement that is, for some, deemed political (like the cruelty of living in slums and the need to get rid of them), we do acknowledge that the matter is much bigger than the realm of urban planning. Town planners and architect MIGHT be able to tell you what's wrong and what's right. Or how to make a wrong right. but we can't tell you how to get the funds to make it.
So is there must a compromise between heavy regulation and chaotic evolution? I believe there is. There are cities around the world that had developed with the least involvement of city authorities. I'm not suggesting that regulations will always have a negative impact, far from it. But the planner should allow for fair amount of creativity on the part of the architects. Decentralize municipal control and allow communities to organize themselves locally.
This is best seen in an organic development of a city. There will be a focal point, be it a seaport, an airport, a dam, an industrial complex..etc.. And around that focal point the city will grow. Now, imagine if that focal point is linear in shape, like a sea front, and that it takes a meandering course along one side of the city. Now, add to that an array of hills, canyons and winding ridges, all gently sloping down to the sea front. Let's also envision a breath-taking natural scenery of green forests that the city planners and residents are conscious not to utterly murder. Coincidentally, let's suppose that architects and residents are adamant on painting their buildings and houses in an endless spectrum of colors that defies order and challenge the scenery around it for the attention of the beholder.
Finally, imagine cable cares and the first public library in South America.
Imagine the great pacific ocean as an imposing background for all the above setting.
You get Valparaiso!
Thursday, September 03, 2009
This is how you hook up with a ho
READ BELOW BEFORE LISTENING
The story is this: a girl was out with friends having drinks on King St (in Toronto ). This guy approaches her and won't leave her alone -saying how cute she is. She finally gives in and hands the guy her business card to get rid of him.
The attached is an MP3 file of not one, but TWO voicemails this guy left. This goes down in the history books - especially the second voice mail.
After hearing them you can clearly see why she didn't call him back - instead she called in to the Z103.5 morning show & had them play this on the air.
Ladies: He is out there... :)
The story is this: a girl was out with friends having drinks on King St (in Toronto ). This guy approaches her and won't leave her alone -saying how cute she is. She finally gives in and hands the guy her business card to get rid of him.
The attached is an MP3 file of not one, but TWO voicemails this guy left. This goes down in the history books - especially the second voice mail.
After hearing them you can clearly see why she didn't call him back - instead she called in to the Z103.5 morning show & had them play this on the air.
Ladies: He is out there... :)
Tuesday, September 01, 2009
Empthay With the Less Fortunate
K, a colleague of mine, had to leave his car at the workshop for a lengthy service today. He ended up hitching a ride with me since, well, I will only have to drop him on my way. Just a 20-50 minutes detour is all what it’ll take.
There is a trend now in offices of architecture around the world; which is to have an open plan kind of an office. Absolutely partition free. With huge dining-like table in the middle on which laptops and drawings can be strewn about… This ingenuity wouldn't work in our office. Our office is one of the places where walls are still functioning beautifully and could even use more thickness. This is the sorts of colleagues that I have. (come to think of it, they probably think the same of me, and of each other)
So K and I got into a beautiful silence. The BBC newscaster was yelling from the speakers. And K didn’t find a chance to engage in a conversation. Until such point where there was silence from the radio and he said something odd.
“ma btest7y” (she doesn’t feel ashamed of herself)
“who?” I said
“that Indian girl over there”
He pointed in the direction of a tiny Peugeot. The driver, who looked like a South Asian girl, was eating from a small paper container laid next to her on the passenger seat.
“what do you mean, that she’s eating while driving?” I said.
“no, that she’s eating in Ramadan in public!”
“public? What public? She’s inside her car with the doors closed, how could that rate as public to you?”
“well, we can see her, so it’s public”
“suppose she can’t eat anywhere else?”
“she can eat at home”
“suppose she has Muslim roommates?”
“then she could have eaten at work”
“suppose there’s no such facility at her work, and that her office mates are all fasting Muslims?”
“efff…! You can find excuses for her if you like, you can always do that”
Yes, I can always do and will always do that. And I pity those who can’t find excuses for others. Especially that one of the main purposes of fasting is to invoke feelings of empathy towards your fellow human beings who are less fortunate. It’s sad that some would starve themselves hungry to reach that point of sensitivity but wouldn’t go a little notch further and feel empathic with non-fasting human fellows.
There is a trend now in offices of architecture around the world; which is to have an open plan kind of an office. Absolutely partition free. With huge dining-like table in the middle on which laptops and drawings can be strewn about… This ingenuity wouldn't work in our office. Our office is one of the places where walls are still functioning beautifully and could even use more thickness. This is the sorts of colleagues that I have. (come to think of it, they probably think the same of me, and of each other)
So K and I got into a beautiful silence. The BBC newscaster was yelling from the speakers. And K didn’t find a chance to engage in a conversation. Until such point where there was silence from the radio and he said something odd.
“ma btest7y” (she doesn’t feel ashamed of herself)
“who?” I said
“that Indian girl over there”
He pointed in the direction of a tiny Peugeot. The driver, who looked like a South Asian girl, was eating from a small paper container laid next to her on the passenger seat.
“what do you mean, that she’s eating while driving?” I said.
“no, that she’s eating in Ramadan in public!”
“public? What public? She’s inside her car with the doors closed, how could that rate as public to you?”
“well, we can see her, so it’s public”
“suppose she can’t eat anywhere else?”
“she can eat at home”
“suppose she has Muslim roommates?”
“then she could have eaten at work”
“suppose there’s no such facility at her work, and that her office mates are all fasting Muslims?”
“efff…! You can find excuses for her if you like, you can always do that”
Yes, I can always do and will always do that. And I pity those who can’t find excuses for others. Especially that one of the main purposes of fasting is to invoke feelings of empathy towards your fellow human beings who are less fortunate. It’s sad that some would starve themselves hungry to reach that point of sensitivity but wouldn’t go a little notch further and feel empathic with non-fasting human fellows.
First Annual Competition for Best Syrian Blogsمسابقة المدون السنوية لأفضل المدونات السورية....ء
This must be the first "competition" of its kind in the Syrian blogsphere. And as with many things that are done for the first time, there are lots of glitches and loopholes. I'm saddened to see that many of my bloging friends aren't participating. Anyway, I've put up my blog there for the heck of it. Under the category of 'Best Content', no less (there weren't special categories for asshatery, sexual permissiveness, or artful profanity). Sadly, again, the voting page is entirely in Arabic. And anyway, I think the uptight jurors (minus my friends, of course) do not want people who speak English to vote.
Although one has to wonder why are my English only speaking readers not allowed to vote for me?
Uptight, I told you.
So my dear Arabic readers, vote for me if you will. The moment I get elected, your life will be full of proper asphalt roads, and if not, then asphalt alone will do. I will provide you with free healthcare and free education. (but wait, you're ALREADY educated and healthy; you can read this blog and not get sick)... Anyway, if you're an Arabic speaking reader of this blog and wish to vote for me, by all means do. I'll be thankful and together we'll split the spoils when they come.
Vote for me here.
صوتوا لمدونتي المتواضعة في أول مسابقة للمدونات الالكترونية السورية. زوروا صفحة التصويت هنا, املؤا استمارة الاستعلام ثم اختاروا مدونتي من فصيلة المدونات ذات المحتوى المتميز... و من ثم اضغطوا على خطوة ثانية و أعطوني العلامة التي تعتقدون أنني أستحقها في كل محور من محاور الشر ... عفوا أقصد محاور التقييم. ثم اطبعوا الكود الموجود على الخطوة الثالثة و هكذا تكونوا قد أنهيتم ملئ استمارة التصويت و يمكنكم حينئذ أن تبعصوها... عفوا, أقصد يمكنكم أن تبعثوها بالضغط على زر "أرسل"....ء
و لكم جزيل الشكر......ء
(لا تنسوا أيضا أن تصوتوا لأصدقائي المدونيين الذين تعرفونهم جيدا)
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